Pass in Time::Morphology

Like witnessing an Andy Goldsworthy art piece change over time, I've been able to see progress on my art piece. It's coming together, but slowly. I don't feel any need to force it and since there is no place to show it, there is no deadline to complete it.

I've been looking through old photographs taken on my digital camera from the last year. I was reminded of the fact that I managed to see both the Pacific and Atlantic oceans last year. In less than 6 months, I had gone 1500 miles in one direction and 1500 miles in the other. I guess I didn't realize this until in retrospect and it's an inspiring feeling.

I'm in the middle of completing the rest of my graduate school applications and getting psyched at my progress. I'm ecstatic that I can maintain a sense of myself through all the daily craziness. I'm thrilled when I can manage to have a day off to do stupid stuff like laundry and grocery shopping. I enjoy this almost as much as staying up late at night and meticulously cutting out pieces for the art piece.

I have this box of papers that I've collected: chocolate bar wrappers, origami papers from Los Angeles, old envelopes, magazine bits, handmade paper scraps from an art store in Irvine, CA, and random catalogs. It's a little box of treasures, representing something somehow more sustainable than the metal I used to work in. Granted, I still have lots of metal scraps and pieces, but not having the tools to melt them down and pour ingots, I am left with pieces that I cannot use. Why has paper replaced this void?

I read this article on NPR about paper as the new popular art medium. It's such a funny statement, having come from a painting background, where works on paper are considered low art, just as metalsmithing is considered "just a craft". Where has this change occurred? Is it because paper is so accessible? I'm fascinated by my own feelings of "preciousness" towards certain types of paper. For example, plain white copy paper is not nearly as interesting as the origami papers I picked up at Kinokuniya bookstore in Japantown.

Most of the emphasis for my new art work is the barrier of using collage bits on a supportable frame. I'm merely using glue and paper. However, it is not nearly as direct as paint on a canvas or a hammer blow to metal sheet. I get to compose the papers on the canvas and this is part of its charm.

Admittedly, sometimes I feel the need to hit some metal or stab a canvas with a paintbrush doused in copious amounts of red paint. For the time being, however, I will find solace in this newfound art form.

The freedom to...

...do the things I think I should. That is all.

Progress on the new piece.

The Beginning is the End is the Beginning.

I took my GRE this morning and did better than average, which is basically good enough for me. I feel like I'm in a video game, where I finished one level and now have to proceed to the next. Only, it's much harder, the monsters are scarier, and it will take a lot of strategy. Thankfully, I have already initiated the process by applying to schools in advance. I have three more applications to complete, two of which are in the North Texas area. I had not come to mental collapse over this test, thank goodness. Now, I can concentrate on the projects I put aside in order to focus on studying. For example, a new art piece I had started. Below is the bluish wash I put on a 3 foot x 4 foot canvas. I'm hoping to get even more detail-oriented with this piece than the last one. I will also vary the shapes of the collage elements I use. It will be interesting if I can actually manage a cohesive set of work in this collage vein. Regardless, it keeps me sane to work on something that isn't graduate school or work related.

I will keep everyone posted...

Contextually Conceptual or The More Oxygen Available, the Better

It's been awhile since I've written something profoundly personal blog-wise. I know much of this goes out into the void and is impersonal in that respect, but I figured I would spare a moment to vent a bit.

I take the GRE (Graduate Record Examination) in less than a week. Understandably, I'm having some anxiety over this test. Not because I'm a bad test-taker, because the opposite is true. However, this is a culmination of things that I have wanted so badly and things I thought I wanted badly. I feel like someone who is coming closer to getting on a roller-coaster, with all the mixed feelings of fear, excitement, dread, and joy.

I've been enjoying my internship at The Modern so much, I'm already sad about it coming to an end in May. This has made rethink my path as an artist, a researcher, and a teacher. I've been all three in the present, juggling my responsibilities of my day job, bouncing around concepts and ideas while I carry around books like a waitress. I have a romanticism for my own future and its possibilities. A former professor of mine even ventured forth the following: "your wingspan will never be greater than it is now." I've taken this to heart and hope that I will not disappoint anyone. I realize on some level, this is ridiculous, because the only person I can truly disappoint is myself. I like to think I've done a bang-up job of respecting myself. However, there are these two little words that create, quite possibly, the most complex phrase in the English language: "What if?"

In a different realm, I'm still working on my theories about how intrinsic context is to concept. A single example I can make of this correlates with oral history. You know how in anyone's family a story is passed down from generation to generation, a semblance of embellishment takes place? I would argue that the truth is not neglected, but perhaps the viewpoint has changed. If the viewpoint has changed and appears as truth to that person, isn't that as powerful as the original truth?

I have been researching art, artists, and history lately in hopes to understand some correlations. For example, I just completed Monuments Men by Robert Edsel. I was fascinated by the plight of a few smattering of men, thrown into different parts of the military, for the sole purpose of finding, protecting, and in many cases, repatriating, some of the world's most precious art. It has renewed my interest in art as something more than a process, but something that represents cultures and freedom. I have a few books on my bedside table at this point, most currently Pop: The Genius of Andy Warhol by Tony Scherman and David Dalton. I'm reading it in hopes to gain some insight before the upcoming Warhol exhibition opens at The Modern on Valentine's Day. Again, another scenario where I think context is associated with concept. The book is focused on Warhol's earlier years, while the exhibition will be on his later years.

I am reminded of being in art school, where I slept, ate, bled, cried, and dreamt art. The physicality of creating art constantly, for personal reasons, and for deadlines, was sometimes a daunting process. I remember being outside of the wood shop at school during winter and accidently hammering a nail through the tip of one of my fingers. I didn't notice because my fingers were so numb, but when I started bleeding all over the wood, I remember thinking: "oh God, I've come to a point where I don't realize that I'm hurting for the sake of art." Needless to say, I was more careful later on, especially in the metals studio. Will it be too raw to continue those art studies? More specifically, do I have it in me?

Lots of decisions need to be made, but I will decide each one as they come.

The trick is to keep breathing...

Onto the next.

The piece I started awhile ago is all finished and in the middle of being judged for the 500x Expo Show, so cross your fingers. The next few pics include the finished piece and then a shot with an addition of acrylic paint. It will be interesting to see how these pieces continue. I plan to collage for the next piece as well, but now I'm experimenting with layers of acrylic as part of the background and foreground. I also plan to create some more tongue-in-cheek commentary. Photos will be posted in progress...stay tuned.

And they're off...!

So, a proverbial horse race is beginning this month. However, all great and fantastic things are developing. To name some in no particular order:

1. Dyed my hair red, for fun, and to truly keep the "redhotflame" moniker that I adore so much...

2. Continuing with the internship at The Modern with the Teen-Artist Program. Hopefully the new blog in the works for them will be connected to this one so everyone can see their progress.

3. Still working on the new art piece that is nearly complete. This will be entered in the call for artists at the 500x gallery in Dallas. http://www.500x.org

4. Upcoming GRE test (yikes!) and more graduate school applications flying through the post office.

5. Finally, I found out that my interview for Art Conspiracy, along with other artists, was posted on the KERA Art & Seek website. Maybe my camera-shyness is disappearing...?

Art Conspiracy: The Artist Interviews

More pics below of the new art piece, enjoy.

Progress...

So, the new piece I have been working on is a slow and tedious process. However, with that said, I'm enjoying making it immensely. It's a collage on a 2' x 3' canvas. Once the collage is complete, I plan on applying paint to the surface, perhaps Rauschenberg-style. I will keep you posted on its completion. For now, here are photos of its progress: